my uncle (tom robinson/buddy) passed away on sunday, and i am deeply saddened.  he was a really great guy, and i will miss him intensely.  if you knew him and would like to go to the memorial service it will be this friday night at 7pm in winsted, ct.  

what is going on?  i said i was going to make an effort to post something good last week.  i failed to do that.  my plate is too full.  i don't know how to cope with everything right now, so there may be a substantial lapse in posts.  i will post if i feel moved to do so, but i will be focusing my attention elsewhere.  likewise, there will be no more free spoon radio show.  when things settle down i may do a show again, or i may have a mini-show music blog thing, but i haven't listened to anything new for weeks, and i don't plan on getting anything new soon (though i do want to listen to the new magnetic fields record - maybe i'll go out and get it).  

if you pray, pray for tom robinson.  if you don't pray, think warm thoughts about him.  i don't pray to anything, but sometimes i wish i did.  it seems to make some people feel better.  it's a funny thing, faith.  the only thing i have faith in is my wife.  she often makes me feel better, but i don't think i'll be praying to her. maybe i'll just keep busy.    

stick with me.  there will be greatness, but probably not soon, and almost definitely not on a regular basis for a few months.  do not abandon.  be patient, but try not to be a patient. 

sincerely, 

jim turbert

is it me, or does it seem like january is flying by?  there isn't enough time for anything.  i'm going to make one interesting post this week if it kills me.  i'll try harder tomorrow.  

i'm trying to make some new photos, and it's not going well.  i'd share some of my efforts with you, but i'm not into showing people my failures.  my idea is good, at least the heart of the idea is good, but it's not there yet.  i am not excited about any of my results.  that is perhaps the worst feeling after hours of hard work.  i'll try harder tomorrow.    

goodnight, 

jim 

jesus h. christ...  i just spent the whole night trying to get goddamned windows to install on my mac.  it almost worked.   when i say almost worked, i mean it didn't work.  i guess there's always tomorrow, but who wants to spend their time doing this shit?  i don't, but i kind of have to, so i will keep trying until i succeed.  success will be so sweet.  i can't wait.

one would think that winter break would be glorious, but these are trying times.  things are not going my way.  how are you?  

best, 

jim   

today i learned that 650 watt lights should not be made out of plastic. if you have a plastic 650 watt light (such as the atlas-warner super 8 light), DO NOT LEAVE IT ON for longer than a few minutes. when i say a few, i mean 2 minutes. seriously.  my house smells like molten plastic.    

best,
jim

the holiday season is over. it doesn't look like i'll be celebrating anything else in the near future.
it seems like forever since i last posted. i turned 32 last week. i bought a new muffler for my car on my birthday. mufflers are not cheap. neither are tires. i bought those recently, too. both my car and i are getting older. the car needs a new clutch. i need to work out. i still think i have a higher resale value than the subaru, but we are both pretty clunky. we are also both good in the snow (thanks to my new boots).
well, have a lovely new year.

best,
jim

i think i'm over wishing stomach cancer on my neighbors now. that's never a good thing.

marleen was telling me that if the weather keeps behaving as forecast, then we will have more snow by the end of the weekend than we had all last winter. gosh, i want it to stop. it sure is purty though.

best,
jim

beardcicles! i rode my bike to work this morning. this is what i looked like when i arrived. shit is crazy. i'm glad i rode in, but i think i'm going to wait a bit until the snow on the sides of the road clears more before i ride in again. i was the holeshot king on the ride in. there is a thin layer of ice all over everything. that ice doesn't really bother the cars, but it makes a huge difference for bikes. if i was only riding in boston i wouldn't worry about it, but i think i may get killed on my night commute.

until next time,
jim

remember the other day (was it yesterday?) that i said that the end of 2007 means the end of interest in jim turbert and his self-portraits? well, i got a rejection letter from a show today. that show is called "self-evident : contemporary american self-portraiture." if there was ever a show that i should be in, i think this would be the one. it's a bunch of yahoos taking pictures of themselves, and it's in a not-for-profit gallery. i'm not saying that this means it's curtains for turbert, but jesus, that would be a good show for me to be in. hopefully the show will be full of famous people. then i won't feel so bad. if it's a bunch of other "emerging artists" (or "nobodies" like myself) then i will be sad.
i'm just bitching. i understand that every curator has a vision of what their show should be, and i am fully aware that not everyone is interested in pictures of me. i'm not really offended that i was not included in this show, but i did hope that i would be invited. normally, i don't like to broadcast my failures, but i thought this one was amusing. i hope you find it amusing as well.

i'm being awfully forthright with my feelings lately, aren't i?

best,
jim

friends give me a hard time about hating people, but i really do hate people. not everyone, but people in general because they typically are self-centered assholes who do things because they are easy without regard for those around them. i live on a crowded street with limited on-street parking and some douche decided this was a good idea...
i wish i knew for certain who was responsible, because if i did i would move all that snow to their fucking doorstep, and then when they would come outside to yell at me, i would hit them with the shovel. my working theory is that whomever plowed the driveway across the street pushed all the snow into that perfectly good parking space in front of my house. mind you, this is someone with a driveway.  they don't even need to worry about parking.  if no one moves this pile of snow, it could stay there all winter. it probably won't stay there, but if the temperature doesn't rise significantly, giant mounds of snow tend to remain giant mounds of snow. i can't see any of the people in my building moving it, so i will be out there tomorrow shoveling the pile of snow away. i really want the responsible partie(s) to be uncomfortable. very uncomfortable, like stomach cancer or something. happy fucking holidays. i hate you from the core of my being.

sincerely,
jim turbert

dude... we have snow. lots of snow. i just want to take this time to sing the praises of my car. my car may look and sound like some retarded kid's go cart, but while i was cruising past all the suckers stuck in the snow on my way home from work tonight, i was glad i opted for a subaru. shit was crazy, or as marleen said, "like a hot knife through butter."
i guess i could have stopped to help all those stranded on the sides of the road, but there were so many of them, that i would have been there all night. besides that, i am not mother theresa. i help people, but there comes a time when you realize you can't help everyone. it just so happens that i realized (or re-realized) this on my way home from work this evening. i am a bastard. marleen was disappointed in me, but we'd probably still be in a line of stranded people if i didn't take matters into my own 4 wheels. anyway, i just want to say that the all whell drive power of the subaru impreza is so good. so good.

sincerely,
jim

2007 is almost over. today marked the last day of classes at wellesley. i am happy about that, but it means that i have all sorts of other responsibilities to think about. i have to buy people gifts, and i need to take a bunch of pictures. i also need to contact a bunch of people. i've fallen way behind in my correspondences. shit is crazy. on top of all that i, i had to buy new tires today. shit is expensive, and they didn't do the alignment right. the guy at the major new england tire retailer i went to made a point of showing me a diagram of how far out of whack my wheels were before. i find it odd that my car seemed to drive in a straight line without any effort before, but now that they fixed it my subaru consistently pulls to the left. whose dick do you have to suck to get some service around here. don't they know that i have shit to do? i don't want to have to go back down there so they can straighten me out. i don't want to, but i have to. there is no justice.
as i was saying, 2007 is almost over. it's been a good year, and i don't know if i should expect 2008 to be as good, or if i should expect a sudden downward spiral of pain and suffering. i am not excited about pain or suffering (some people are, you know...). already, they've taken my photo off of the front page of flak photo. it's still a site worth visiting, but damn did it look good with me on it. also, the show i'm in in lexington, ky is coming down this week if i'm not mistaken. is my departure from flakphoto a sign that people are already sick of my shit? they've only been looking at me for a few months. i'm not going to worry about it. i just had a few small prints up during art basel at gallery diet in miami, fla. also, i'm going to be in a show in pittsburgh, pa next summer. i have an idea for a new photo series. the new jams will not involve costumes or dressing up. i'm not sure if people will like that. at this point, i'm not sure if i'll like it. as of right now, i have a bunch of crappy sketches in my notebook that sort of illustrate my plans. i'll get cracking on those. then you can look at the pictures and tell me what you think. alright, it's a deal.

best,
jim

damn.  what was possibly the last free spoon radio ever came and went yesterday.  i've been doing the show for 6 years, but now i think it's time to stop.  i know i've posted this before, but here are some links to the archives >> http://freespoon.jtfanclub.com and here is an awesome advertisement >> http://jtfanclub.com/radioads/120507.htm

happy december.  more later.  

best, 

jim

i just made my first pumpkin pie.  i don't think the crust is going to be super awesome.  i used "white whole wheat" flour.  i'm not sure how a flour can be both white and whole wheat, but i am looking forward to eating it.  i also made pumpkin bread.  i'm looking forward to eating that too. don't you wish you lived with me?  we'd have so much fun, and we'd eat lots of snacks.

other than fun with baked goods, not a lot is happening.  i took some pictures yesterday, and then i played civilization on the computer.  civilization is a good way to waste a lot of time.  if you've never played, then i don't recommend starting because it will suck many of  your hours away. tomorrow is the start of a grueling two day work week.  when i say grueling, i mean not grueling. it's going to be short and sweet.  as sweet as pumpkin pie in fact.  mmm...pie.

marleen is away, but she'll be home in a few hours.  she has her digital camera with her, but when she gets home i may document my glorious pie and post the image here.  you will wish you lived with me.  

until later,

jim  

the above image is an unprecedented look into the process of making a jim turbert self-portrait.  dave olsen helped me out while i was shooting, and he also brought his trusty new canon elph along to document the magic.  it truly was magical.  just ask the freezing muensterman sisters in the background.  they loved every second of it.  

that's all for now.  

with all my love, 

jim turbert

the other day marleen and i came home and there were 5 cop cars parked outside of our house. there was no sign of hardcore police action so we didn't know what was going on. cop party? well, when we went through the first door we discovered that the cops were inside our building. fortunately, they weren't interested in us, but they were investigating one of our upstairs neighbors. one of them asked us if we knew "anything about your upstairs neighbor?" we assumed they were talking about the guy who lives directly above us because he had some "issues" with the local authorities before. actually, he used to have a jokey doormat that said "COME BACK WITH A WARRANT!" that doormat disappeared after the police actually came and took him with them, but i digress. it turns out they were looking for one of our other upstairs neighbors. given this information you may choose to believe that i live in a rough and tumble neighborhood, but this is not the case. it's a lovely neighborhood, and the only police action i've seen on my street has been in my house. i hope they don't come for me next.

since my last post, i've done all sorts of fun stuff.  i went to new york, and i got a new scanner.  i didn't get the scanner in new york.  i got a scanner and i went to new york.  that's all i've got for you right now.  

best, 

jim 

  

i used this jim dow picture for an advertisement for my halloween radio show this year.  i'm not sure he would appreciate that.  i will remove it if he complains.  i don't think reads my blog or listens to my radio show, so do me a favor and don't tell him i'm using it.  

http://jtfanclub.com/radioads/freakyspoon.htm

thanks, 

jim 

hello.  if you are in the greater lexington, kentucky area on october 26, you should go check out the photo show "Photography : What Now?" at the lexington art league >>>   http://www.lexingtonartleague.org

i'm in the show along with a bunch of other folks who i know nothing about.  i won't be there, but three of my pictures will be.  three pictures could very well be more exciting than i am in person, so don't let my absence keep you from making a special trip.

also, you should get yourselves ready for the halloween version of free spoon.  i've taken to calling the halloween show freaky spoon because it's so scary.  yes, scary.  

i have a headache.  i'm also kind of hungry, but i can't eat because we're supposed to go out to dinner with some chums  at 7 or so.  what should i do?  

best, 

jim 

  

today i decided that i need to pursue a new job. i'm not going crazy or anything, but i looked briefly at monster.com, and i thought all day about how awesome it would be to work somewhere besides wellesley. i have worked there for almost 6 years, and it is totally ungratifying. also, i am completely disrespected and discounted as a person by the department i work for.  i could go on about this for hours, but i will spare you.  i will say that i think i'm going to try to find work in holland so i can uproot my ass and become an ex-patriot.  

where should i work in holland?  at a school?  should i go to school?  should i try to work for an american company? should i start an american style ice cream store?  something needs to be done, and i need to motivate.  if you know of any employment opportunities in the greater holland area, please let me know.  i know how to do a lot of stuff, and i learn quickly.  on top of that, almost anyone would be way less enjoyable to work with. 

while thinking about moving to holland i had the sad realization that after living in boston since 1995 i have nothing to show for it.  if i left, no one would even notice.  how fucked up is that?  most of my friends have left, and the ones that are here may or may not be for much longer.  i probably wouldn't even visit boston if i came home from holland.  i would be more likely to visit minneapolis than boston.  shit is crazy.  

so, i guess i have to ad some kind of a portfolio or demo-reel to the list of things i need to do.  if i'm going to get hired by someone here or abroad, i think i'm going to need a fancy multi-media presentation and some content to put in it.  i'll work on that, and i'll keep you posted.  

love, 

jim turbert   

here is a form message that i was asked to share with my people...

you are my people.  

Greetings,

A piece titled Astronaut, from my expectations vs. reality series is up for auction in the 2007 PRC Benefit Auction, a benefit event for the Photographic Resource Center, a New England non-profit. As you can imagine, the success of such events is vital for such contemporary spaces and raises important operating and programming funds. (If you'd like to learn more about my image/series please go to my website, jtfanclub.com )

From the PRC: "This annual exciting event provides an opportunity to glimpse (and own!) close to 200 approaches to photography from leading regional and national photographers. This year, through live and silent auction, at close to 200 fine framed photographs are available for bidding in our largest fundraiser of the year. The preview exhibitions are up through October 21 and all images are available via elegant print and online catalogues. Join us the night of Saturday, October 27th for a vibrant and fun event."

To see a complete catalogue of images that will be up for auction go to: 
http://www.prcboston.org/auction/catalogue07/index.htm 

Wherever this may find you, I hope you are well! 

Best, 
 

 jim turbert

DUDE! i totally have a business card now. does that make me a professional? does it make me grown up? shit is crazy. now if someone asks me if i have a card, i can say, "yes, i have a card. would you like one?" how sweet is that? i can leave my card in all the resturants where there is a free lunch raffle. sweet. i like free lunch. i can give it to people, and they can throw it away when they get home, or they can use it as a bookmark, or they can contact me in the future. the possibilities are endless. this could seriously be life changing.
have a good weekend.

love,
jim

a "parcel" was returned to me today due to improper postage.  the "parcel"  was a large envelope with three sheets of paper and a cd jewel case inside it.  when i initially sent this "parcel"  i went to the world famous jamaica plain post office and used their after hours postage machine/package sending unit.  i was happy it was there so i didn't have to go to the post office during normal business hours.  it's more convenient to go after hours, and i hate all the people who work in that god forsaken office, so i'd prefer to not see them.  anyway, my happiness faded away today when i saw the returned envelope sitting outside my door with the returned for postage sticker on it.  also, the words large envelope in the postage sticker were circled and the word "parcel"  was written next to the postage.  when i saw the envelope i wanted to break shit.  i felt the rage, and i wanted to fight.

i went to the post office to figure out what the fucking problem was, and it turns out that as of may something, a large envelope ceases to be a large envelope it you put something hard that cannot bend in it.  i'm not sure where that logic comes from, but the u.s. asshole postal service charged me an additional 33 cents and i was on my way.  i hate the postal service.  i hate their weird regulations.  i hate many of (not all of) their employees, and i hate needing them.  

love, 

jim 

  

up late...  

must go to bed...  

work tomorrow...  

feelings of dread...

i've been working on the computer for a million hours.  i don't feel awesome, but i'm not tired.  i know i should go to bed so i can be fresh for work tomorrow, but there is so much to do.  

i've had the past few days off.  days off are the best, but the realization that tomorrow is not a day off brings me to new lows.  also, i'm worried about copyright law and i should exercise more.  yes, exercise.  yes copyright.  oh, i forgot to call andrew.  i also forgot to call rusty.  guys, if you are reading this, i will call you soon.  maybe tomorrow before the best radio show in the world.    

http://freespoon.jtfanclub.com

i'll have the new installment posted by the end of the week.  you can catch up on old episodes in the meantime.  

do you know any cheerleaders who might want to be in a picture?

good night.  

your buddy, 

jim 

i swear i'm not going to let my blog become a place where i shamelessly promote all the random crap that i do. well, i swear that it will be more than a place where i shamelessly promote whatever random crap i'm doing. that said, my radio show is back on the air. no, the station is not webcasting at the moment, but you can listen to the archives that i diligently post. okay, i don't do it so diligently, but by friday you should be able to listen to last week's show, and tonight's show. here is the link >>> http://freespoon.jtfanclub.com/

here is a link to an advertisement for tonight's show >>> http://jtfanclub.com/radioads/100307.htm

now that i got that out of the way, i can tell you about all the other exciting stuff in my life.
yeah...i gotta go.

best,
jim

it's already the middle of september. time is flying by, and i don't know how to cope with it. soon i'll be enveloped in the pain of the deep freeze of winter. it will feel like a lifetime of suffering. the seasons that aren't winter are great, but winter is the season with the most dominant personality. winter is the person in the conversation who won't let you say anything, but keeps talking about himself the whole fucking time. you try to get a few words in, but everything you say is always diverted back into another aspect of the saga of winter. it's pointless to resist it's all powerful grasp. you cannot escape. summer is awesome because there are no winter like qualities, but for some reason i think of summer as being a small rest stop on the long road back toward the pain of winter. summer is to be savored because it doesn't last too long. spring is okay, but it always takes so long to become spring-like, that i just think of it as a way for winter to fuck with your mind for a little longer. fall is my favorite, but its glories are so fleeting that if you happen to be really busy, you won't even notice that it's gone from the sweetest weather ever to a snowing frozen wasteland outside, and it may as well be winter. i'm kind of freaking out about winter. i should not be thinking about it at all, but i can't help myself. i hate it. i don't even think i like the first snow anymore. the first snow can go fuck itself. i want to be comfortable, and i don't want to wear a huge cumbersome coat. i think i should move away from here.
also, i believe that the longest and most painful day of the week is monday.
i totally want to leave this place right now.

sincerely,
jim

heeeey....
i just noticed that a few people posted comments on my blog. that tickles me to death. of course, the comments were left a month ago, and i was totally oblivious. i'll tell you what. if you post comments, i promise to check them. it will be fun and stuff like that. seriously.
thanks starkey and leslie. you guys rule.

in reference to my milk lover picture starkey posted :

"Is the milk whole milk? My friend Kelly prefers whole milk also and I told her about how the doctor told you to stop drinking it one time because of "cholesterol." But can you really hold the whole down?"

my response:

" i can hold the whole milk down. i love the stuff, but alas, i have switched to 1%.
whole or otherwise, i'll milk drink anyone under the table, and then i'll wash it down with some cheese.
damn."

you should totally enter the brilliant conversations taking place in the comments. it is freaking amazing. look for the link below this post. it's the one that says "0 comments." that's zero, not o or oh.

sincerely,
jim

i told you that marleen got her green card the other day. here is the proof.

here is closer proof in case you still don't believe me.

besides the start of the academic year at wellesley college things are not very exciting. marleen coerced me into going to the beach. it was nice when we got there, but the thought of driving a long time to sit on a bunch of sand is generally not appealing to me. it was too cold to go swimming, but it was lovely for walking. i brought one of my super 8 cameras with me. i got some sweet footage of a regal looking seagull. he was standing on a big rock, and was not pleased that i was paying him so much attention, so he blew some bird shit out of his sphincterless ass, and took off. i got it all on film. that's one to save for future generations. i have a feeling that future generations are going to be pissed at me.

i wrote a mega-blog entry a few days ago. it was very big, and it offered much insight into my psyche, but something happened before i could post it, and now it is lost forever. that was less than awesome. i worked a long time on it, and i thought that you, the blog reading public, would be proud of me for my thoroughness and my stick-to-it-iveness. alas, i have let you down again. i can't bring myself to put time in to recreate the grandeur of the now fabled lost jtfanclub blog. stay tuned for more ramblings from my mediocre life.

yours truly,
jim

this is going to be an unremarkable post. i'm only posting because i feel myself sinking back into non-posting/weblog ignoring mode. i must fight it. i don't have anything awesome to report. i could tell you lots of un-awesome things, or at least some very mediocre things, but i won't. i'll wait until tomorrow for that.
happy semester. happy official end of summer. oh happy day.

brightly looking towards tomorrow,
jim turbert

p.s. i am wrong, there is something awesome. marleen's real green card (as opposed to her fake one) arrived in the mail today. that is awesome.

in my last post i bitched about mexican fast food and the frosty dairy dessert from wendy's. well, i had chipotle for the first time yesterday, and it was pretty good. i didn't doubt it would be good. i'm not going to say it's the future of fast food, but it was tasty. i still like my local mexican joints. also, i had a frosty dairy desser two nights ago. i enjoyed it as well. i still don't think it's the only stuff that's worth leaving the house for.
moving on...
i'm in the middle of revamping my film transfer machine. two years ago i modified a super 8 projector for converting film to video according to these plans. it worked, but the projector i was using got damaged after i bought it off of ebay. i'm embarrassed to say, but i took the original projector into the bathroom to clean it after it arrived at my house, and i dropped it on the floor. many vital parts on the inside smashed into little pieces. i felt very dumb. i was able to rig it up, and i completed the machine, but it was very temperamental. it didn't like to accept film reels that had too much or too little leader on the beginning or end of the roll. i eventually stumbled upon another projector of the same make and model, and i converted it for use in the telecine machine two days ago. it's almost ready to go. i need to mount it to a stationary board, and then line all the lenses up, and things should be fine. awesome.
the machine is in wellesley right now, and i'm in boston. i think i'm going to drive out there just to work on it. i really want to work on it. do you ever get that desire to work on a project? i do, and i usually don't stop until it's finished. it really bothers me that the machine isn't in my house right now. i've gotta go.

sincerely,
jim

i got sucked in to watching morning tv while i was eating my cereal today. first it was the cn8 candlepin bowling challenge that got me. those guys are good. i'm not sure if you've ever bowled candlepin style, but it is wicked hard, and very frustrating. the bowlers on the cn8 candlepin bowling challege rise to the challenge of performing on low rate cable television, and kick major ass on those lanes. i surfed through the channels during a commercial, and stumbled upon the phantom gourmet. those guys are douchebags. they were talking about fast food chains, and they were saying how awesome chipotle grill was for mexican food. i'm sure it's a pretty good place, but what the fuck. there are several small local chains that sell awesome fast food mexican that weren't mentioned. they went as far as saying that chipotle was the future of fast food. doesn't macdonald's own chipotle? so, the phantom gourmet is telling us that macdonalds is the future of fast food.
wow, what a daring statement.
anyway, as horible as the show was, i couldn't stop watching it. not only could i not stop watching it, but i was craving all the crap that they were talking about. it was maddening. before each commercial break, they would say, "coming up...the only fast food worth driving to." of course they string you along until the very end of the show when they announce that the fast food worth driving for is wendy's frosty dairy dessert. the fucking frosty. i like frosties, but jesus christ, you can get a better milkshake/dessert/ice cream product just about anywhere, especially if you live in the boston area - which they do. i reassert that those guys are douchebags. so, the show ended, and then i started watching drilling footage of that crazy mine in utah where those guys are trapped. evidently they are going to send a camera down there soon. now i'm not watching tv. i had to stop. it was not rewarding.

best,
jim