So much has happened since my last post. Dave and I have driven from
Boston to South Dakota. We just woke up in The Badlands, and we'll be
here for a few days.
Here are a few things I've learned on this trip so far:

1) Just because something is uncomfortable and appears to be a piece
of shit does not mean that it should be dismissed outright. Rally,
aka Dave's shitty van, is not so shitty. Yes, it is primer gray. Yes,
it gets less than 12 miles to the gallon. No, its seats are not very
comfortable. Will it survive this trip? Fuck yes. That thing is
solid. And LOUD.

2) I kind of knew this already, but EVERYONE is nicer than people from
the northeastern US. I'm not talking shit here. I am from the
northeast, and I am included in this ridiculous generalization.

3) Free wifi is important. During the next presidential election cycle
we should make sure that whichever yahoo is on the winning end is
dedicated to serving that shit up everywhere. Communicating with
everyone has been a supreme challenge during this trip, mostly because
I would have to sell my first child to pay the cellular roaming
charges on my Dutch iPhone.

4) Things that go bump in the night are probably bison. We got to the
Badlands last night, and it took us forever to navigate to the free
camping area. We set up our tent, and then the growling, and
grunting, and cud chewing began. Not knowing how a freaking bison
sounds, we assumed it was an aggressive hunter looking for man flesh.
Dave left the tent to see what was making the sound, and the sound
seemed to disappear, only to return after the tent was zipped up again
. The return of the noise further cemented the idea that we were
being hunted. Slowly. Inefficiently.
Long story slightly shorter, there were a ton of bison chilling
outside our tent when we woke up this morning. They were making the
sounds we heard last night.

Okay. Bye.


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