2.19.2008

my job makes me feel bad.  it's a decent job.  the pay is okay, the benefits are decent, and i don't take it home with me too often.  the downside is that it's totally boring, and it is getting increasingly harder for me to be nice to people.  everything i do is totally mundane.  i make things work.  i show people how to use equipment.  i clean things.  i try to convince students that it's important for them to respect our equipment.  i answer lots of questions.  i solve the same recurring problems (caused by other people) over and over again.  it's demeaning.  i'm convinced that some of the faculty here think that my only responsibility is unjamming old slide projectors.  i was actually introduced to a visiting lecturer one time as the slide projector expert.  that is the only thing that the professor could think to say about me.  shit is crazy.  shit is sad.  besides that, i don't even consider  myself a slide projector expert.  
why do i stay?  i've been asking myself that question more and more lately.  i'm sure all my negative feelings will eventually pass and i will slip into a nice groove of complacency, but right now i really want to find another way to spend my time.  

best, 
jim 


1 comment:

bearfax said...

Jim, if you weren't at Wellesley when I was "there" I would actually probably have imploded during my junior year, just because you are one of the only people there who is not insane. I thank you for your time.

With that said, I think you deserve better than 800 whining girls who break their Pentax K1000 by dropping it in the mud and do not understand why it is wrong to turn in a video camera 2 weeks late.

It's hard because it's like: OH, the art department will be dealt a heavy blow if you leave it. BUT I don't go there anymore, so I don't have to feel it, AND I know that driving to Wellesley every day on Rt 16 sucks a LOT.

Also, Oregon is rad - please do come visit. I realized that while I told you that some nice things about Portland are beer and coffee and dogs, none of which you really care about - I forgot to mention bicycles. People like riding those here. And I know you would too.

Sorry this is so long. BUT IT IS REAL.

STARKEY